Your Heart, Your Head, and Your Gut: In Relationships, When do you use What?
By Ashley Gork
December 07, 2009
We have all been advised to follow our hearts, to remember our heads, and to listen to our guts. But when our hearts are breaking, our heads are aching, and our stomachs are tied up in knots, how do we know which body parts to overlook and which ones to trust?
The Heart
We have been told ever since the golden years of Cinderella and Snow White, that if we simply follow our hearts all of our dreams will come true. Well a couple pints of ice cream, a few cigarettes, and twenty-some years later and all of that fairy tale shit isn't worth a dime. Experience has taught us the cruelties of the world and the vulnerability of our hearts. It has shown us that even when our hearts see a knight in shining armor, reality holds a bum in stained pajama pants and a Legalize Pot T-shirt. So why do so many people still listen to their hearts? All things taken into consideration, the heart represents the most capricious and passionate part of the human body. It tells us to leap without the fear of falling and to love without the fear of losing. Fickle, and often untrustworthy, the heart often gets itself into states of emotional turmoil. However, at the end of the day, the heart is simply a reach for the stars-fly over the fence-first kiss at the end of the night-type of vessel, and you got to respect that.
The Head
We have all heard the phrase, ''don't lose your head'' enough times by now to know that our craniums are important. But when it comes to love and all that mushy relationship stuff, what role could our heads possible play? Logical, and debatably boring, our heads constantly keep us on a balancing beam. Too much in any one direction and our brains will knock us right off the beam and onto our asses. If he is too neat, we're annoyed; too messy and we're running for the hills (or the Lysol). Constantly searching for stability and balance, our heads keep us on the straight and narrow path leading us right into Dullsvile. No white knights, no bad boys, just Dave, his cat, and all of his normalness. But regardless of what the head wants, love has never been logical. If we all lived in a world controlled solely by our heads, we wouldn't end up dating for love, but, rather, for a good 401K plan and a safe future. We would never take chances without statistical supporting evidence or leave our houses without bodyguards. When it comes to love, our heads may keep us safe, but only at the cost of living and loving in the moment.
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