Birth, and the early years

I, John Cady, was born on September 25, 1965, to a Mr. and Mrs. Cady.
I was born in Yokosuka, Japan. My dad was in the Navy, that's why. My middle name is Edward, which came from my grandpa Eddie McKean, who did damn near everything in his life (bandleader, drummer, songwriter, comedy writer, editor, writer/announcer for the radio-turned-TV show Don MacNeil's Breakfast Club, Olympics broadcaster...). I can make cooing sounds which appear to attract muskrat. So yes, success is hereditary.

I grew up in semi-sunny Oak Park, Illinois, home of Ernest Hemingway, Frank Lloyd Wright, Edgar Rice Burroughs and the guy who invented the mars light. I ran cross country and track in high school, not because I was too skinny for football. It was here in cross country that I learned to peel oranges in one strip.

That's me,
before I lost 1600 lbs and went from a size 88 to a size 3

Sexy and 17

Post-secondary life for me began at picturesque Knox College in Galesburg, Illinois. Sooner than I had anticipated though, I grew weary of that "school of hard Knox" joke, so I transferred to the University of Michigan, whose team colors I'd always enjoyed.

At Michigan, I and my friend Jim put out a humor newspaper called The Michigan Delay that was well-received and bankrupted us both. Oh, and a hallmate put a rotten fish under my door one night. They smell bad. It was at about this time that I started losing my hair. So tell your children about the hazards of dormroom cruelty.

Becoming a man

I finally graduated with a degree in 1988 and went to work for the University's Art & Architecture Library, where I worked until 1996. And then I moved to ITCS. Yes, it's the computing department; could you tell by the name? I'm not the only John there, so if you come in and ask for John, a hundred guys named Ted will come running. I don't know why they do that.

Becoming more of a man (yes, there is room)

Today I've got a long-defunct humor publishing company called the Lounge Life Press, and I have no girlfriend. I prefer to think that the latter is not due to the press but rather to a personality flaw of some sort. At any rate, I am always entertaining offers (see my interests and photos circa March '01); I also entertain small groups, if storytelling in broken Welsh is your thing. But enough about me; how do you know Aunt Dolly?

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